What a Difference an Open Heart Makes


By Rosie Terfer

Road conditions were a little iffy when the semi-truck jack-knifed in front of me on the freeway.  Just like they say, everything went into slow motion; and I avoided crashing.  I carefully pulled my car around the semi and searched frantically for my cell phone.  My hands shook; I couldn’t locate my phone.  I considered checking on the driver of the semi; I saw no movement from where my car was safely stopped.  As a couple more cars pulled in beside me, I drove away. My hands shook uncontrollably.  I could have died!  I didn’t want to look at the bloody body of the truck driver.  After all, I had other places to be!  I hoped someone else had found their phone and checked on the driver of that truck.  It wasn’t going to be me.  I’m not cut out for that kind of stuff.

Fast forward 3 months.  On Wednesday, I had a heart-opening psychedelic experience.  Love was coursing through my veins; my entire being basked in the afterglow of peace and calm.  As I drove to the grocery store on Thursday, another collision happened within 4 feet of my car as I waited in the turn-lane.  Since I had a red light, I found my cell phone and called 911.  That was easy enough.  Then, the light turned green, and I made my left turn into the parking lot.  Without a thought, I walked back to the scene of the accident, where the police car was already arriving.  I saw a young woman standing by her smashed car. She was shaking like a leaf, crying and gesturing wildly.  I quietly walked up to her, extended my arms and said, “Come here.  I’ve got you.”  She leaned in as I cradled her shaking body.  I held her tight and sent steams of calm love into her agitated nervous system.  I channeled into her the same care I regularly give to my grandson; unconditional love.   Within minutes, she calmed and stopped shaking.  A paramedic came along, and took the young woman to the ambulance for a first aid assessment.   All I know about her is that her name is Kelsey and she has a young daughter.

A police officer approached me and asked, “Are you her mother?”  I replied, “no, I’m not. I don’t even know her, but I could see that she really needed a hug right now.”   The officer seemed surprised, but quickly said, “I’ve been waiting years for someone to hug me!”  I threw open my arms and he leaned his bulky, stiff body into my warm embrace.  I thanked him for serving as a policeman and helping people like this young woman. He quietly accepted my thanks.

After I provided details of the scene I witnessed just a few feet from my car, he asked if I could safely return to my own vehicle.  I calmly replied, “Yes, I know how to do that.”

Indeed, I know how to do so much more than safely return to my car.  My psychedelic journey the previous day had shown me that I’m a strong powerful woman, with a HUGE heart. I saw that it does not deplete my heart or soul to give freely to others.  I saw that compassion is not a commodity to be carefully doled out to just the people in my immediate circle.  There is enough compassion within me to surround everyone on the planet.

I’ve tapped in to the universal love-force, which connects me in unseen ways with everybody. Getting up close to the accident showed me that I know how to bring my open heart to the pain of another person; to do a random act of kindness for a stranger.  I know how to stay calm in chaos; how to keep my inner peace when scary events swirl around me.   What was the difference between the semi-truck crash and the other accident?  I believe it was the heart-opening I had experienced the day before on my psychedelic journey.  Each journey brings me closer to my divine core of peaceful power and infinite love.  Hugging a stranger at an accident scene is just outward manifestation of the inner transformation.  I feel myself grounded to the infinite love at the core of all beings.  I can show up for myself and others in new, healthy ways.

 I’m so grateful for all that I learn on my psychedelic journeys.  This accident came along to show me that I am integrating my psychedelic love into my ordinary everyday experiences.  And there is such power and grace in seeing that!  My heart continues to sing a happy song and glow with love!

Jessica Nielson